“Honor the space between no longer and not yet.” -Nancy Levin
KEVIN: I finally made it home! Three months away and it felt like a lifetime ago.
My life as I knew it was gone, never coming back.
I had lost my job as an Air Force Avionics Technician, which was the hardest part (I thought) and physically I was not the same. I moved into a small apartment and my mother moved in with me. (I needed 24/7 care).
After a few months, my sister convinced me to get a cat. Probably the best suggestion/decision. I got my cat, KHEMO in May of 2014. He’s great…I digress.
My physical, occupational and speech therapy schedule resumed, and I had to go back to Boston once a month for chemotherapy. I had five months of chemotherapy treatments (March-July).
The landlord at my apartment was not compliant with some of the things I needed, so, I moved one city over to a much better, bigger, more accessible apartment.
Finally, my chemotherapy had ended.
I was thrown a big surprise party. It was nice to see people that I hadn’t seen in almost a year.
Now I’m getting to the fun parts. I had to go through a bit of muck to get here.
In November of 2014, I was asked to attend an adaptive sports program-Air Force Wounded Warrior Program. My mother and I were very skeptical because I was still wheelchair bound. I agreed to try it with the caveat that I could stop going if I couldn’t do it. Thankfully, it was better than we expected, and I did well in certain areas, which I didn’t think was possible. Participating in the adaptive sports program gave me a huge confidence boost.
We started traveling around with the program and in 2015, I qualified to make the Air Force team and go to the Warrior Games. It’s kind of like the Olympics a little and by a vote of my peers, I ended up being the Torch Bearer for the Air Force team.
At the Warrior Games, I got second place in my event-recumbent cycling. I guess I can’t be the best at everything (ha-ha).
In March of 2015, I was medically retired from the Air Force 100% permanent and total disability after serving seven years, ten months. It was a long process that my mom is going to talk about in the book, make sure to buy it! (See MY BOOK)
While all this was going on, in 2015, my mom decided to go back to school to finish her degrees. She had done so much advocacy work helping me navigate the Veteran’s Administration (VA) and my Medical Evaluation Board (MEB) for my military discharge. She saw how complicated and burdensome the process could be at times. She wanted to be able to help others not have to go through what we did, and she wanted to help other military caregivers have a voice in their communities and within the VA system.
When I was discharged in 2015, as part of my benefits package, I was given a grant to build a fully accessible home. My home was built to give me more independence. My mother and I had been meeting with developers and looking at plots of land for about a year before we found suitable land and the right builder.
In May of 2016, we broke ground. I helped to design the house and once it was built, I decorated it. It’s a beautiful home on two acres in a quiet little town. We call it the red, white, and blue house. I was also able to get a truck.
I needed to the truck for my electric wheelchair. I had a brand-new Ford F-150. I couldn’t drive it but, it sure was nice.
MOM: Kevin was finally home. We were able to get him an apartment in the same city he was living before to make the transition easier for him.
He was home but, we were different. I left the life I had before behind, and he would never return to work. My full-time job now was caring for him as he was about to undergo five months of chemotherapy and many more months of physical, occupational and speech therapies.
After settling in, Kevin got a fish, Bruce. The fishbowl sat on a table beside the recliner he bought. He would sit in that chair every day, all day due to sheer exhaustion from the therapies and the chemo treatments. After about two months, his sister finally talked him into getting a cat-KHEMO. KHEMO is a rescue and an angel with fur. The two are truly a match made from heaven. Getting KHEMO was the first, best, big decision Kevin made. I really wonder who rescued who?
He lived in that apartment several months and although he was improving every day, he was wheelchair bound and the apartment was not accessible so, with the help of the community, he ended up moving to a city nearby and got an apartment that was bigger, better, and more accessible.
Once the chemo treatments ended, we had a huge celebration with the Be Bold, Be Bald organization, O.B. Strong team, and family and friends Kevin hadn’t seen in so long.
In November of 2014, we heard about an Air Force program for adaptive sports-Wounded Warrior Program. I was hesitant at first to do it because traveling would be tough. Kevin was in a wheelchair and I didn’t want to do anything that would discourage him but, I also wanted to encourage him to try new things to see what he was capable of. I wasn’t sure how this would all play out but, he agreed to give it a try and I’m so glad he did. He was able to try many different sports and he really exceled in recumbent cycling and air rifle. In 2015, he was chosen to represent the Air Force at the Warrior Games (like an Olympics) and be the Torch Bearer for the team.
In March of 2015, Kevin was medically retired from the Air Force with a 100% permanent and total disability rating. It was a long process and I learned so much from the experience. I will share all the details in the book (go to MY BOOK).
If managing all of this wasn’t enough, in 2015, I decided to go back to school and finish my degrees. I had done so much advocating for Kevin during his journey. I helped him navigate the Veteran’s Administration (VA) and his Medical Evaluation Board (MEB) to medically discharge him. I needed the education to put credibility to my voice to be able to help others not to experience the challenges and burdens we did. As an Air Force Veteran, myself, I also wanted to help other military caregivers have a voice in their communities and in the VA system.
Part of Kevin’s military benefits based on his total and permanent VA rating included an adaptive housing grant. The grant did not pay for the house, but it paid for all the accessible features he needed to live in the house more independently. We met with several developers and looked at lots of land. Kevin finally decided on a piece of land and broke ground in May 2016. Kevin helped to design the house and then decorate it once it was built. I feel like this house gave him back control over his life. He was making decisions for himself and his future. His house is awesome. He gets so many compliments on it. Many people want him to decorate their homes. It is on two acres of land in a quiet town. We call it the red, white, and blue house.
Kevin was also able to get a truck. He needed the truck to transport his electric wheelchair. He couldn’t drive it but, it was a nice truck and came in handy for hauling all the things you need for a new house.
Click here to see Kevin participating in the Warrior Games Air Force Trials!